Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Alone Again, Naturally

Well, after a tumultuous spring, my SAG and I parted company. I suppose it was as amicable as a breakup can be, but that didn't make it any less painful.

I dove back into the dating pool after some small period of self-doubt and misery.  (NB: I started this post in April 2018).

So, now two years and two more relationships gone by, I am trying to determine if I am ready and willing to dive back into the pool, post (mid?) COVID.

Little One has completed her first year of college and is living full-time in her college town. I am living with the hounds and the few chickens I bought over the last two years.  I suppose now that I am pretty much an empty-nester, and a man of a certain age, I ponder how I want to shape my future.

I have had two competing dreams throughout my life. One, to own some land in a very rural part of the US, with woods and pastures, perhaps to farm or run a few head of cattle. As idyllic as that might be, it would be a lot of work. How much work do I really want to do when I retire, or as I decline? How much will I physically be able to do? How does one find that balance between becoming a mushroom, sitting in a recliner, reading, watching telly, and pouring the first glass of scotch ever closer to noon, or even to sweeten the coffee?

The other dream, is life aboard a boat. One of my high school pals and I almost bought a cabin cruiser in the late 80s, but we never did. Now, I have learned to sail, and I like it. Sailboats - all boats - require regular maintenance and upkeep. While technically I can sail, I am not very experienced. I would need more training to truly feel comfortable in heavy weather or heavily trafficked waters.

So while I have Little One in college, and am paying those bills, I continue to contemplate how I will chart my course.